HOW TO SAVE MONEY DURING SHOPPING >>>
Nowadays many people wasting their money during shopping for their unnecessary used. Why should we spend so much money during shopping? Thus, here are many ways to save money during shopping. Such as, buy the item that we needed or listed before shopping, bring small amount of money during shopping, and search an item that give a reasonable price or sales.
Firstly, there are many way to save money during shopping. That is buy the things that we need or listed before shopping. Moreover, by listing the things that we need to buy can prevent from wasting our money in other unnecessary things. Such as, junk food, candy, toy and many more.
Besides that, bring small amount of money during shopping can save money. Thus, when we bring small amount of money we will not spend more than we had. So, it can help to save our money. Example, the cereal product A is RM50 and product B is RM35, if we bring small amount of money then we will buy the lower price of an item.
Lastly, search an item that have a reasonable price or on sales. Apart from that, we should find an item that gives a reasonable price or sales. So that, we can save some money that we use during shopping. Thus, this can save our money.
In short , we must not waste money during shopping. This is because save money is important for our life nowadays. Therefore, it is better to prevent then cure ...
Nowadays many people waste their money during shopping for their unnecessary use. Why should we spend so much money during shopping? (look at the first and second sentences. sentence 1-->you use "people", referring to others or them.now,sentence 2-->you use "we", referring to us. you have to be consistent with point of view. are you using "them", "us" or "i"? Check again). Thus, here are many ways to save money during shopping. Such as, ("such as" is more suitable to be used in the middle of a sentence, not in the beginning) buy the item that we needed or listed before shopping, bring (a)small amount of money during shopping, and search (for) an item (better use "items" because normally, you don't only buy one item when you go for shopping) that give a reasonable price.
ReplyDeleteFirstly, there are many way(s) to save money during shopping (is this your topic sentence? try to locate your controlling ideas? if you can't find them, it shows that your topic sentence is not good). That is buy the things that we need or listed before shopping.(how about "we can do this by making a list of needed items before we step in the shopping mall." now, which sentence is better?). listing the things that we need to buy can prevent us from wasting our money in other unnecessary things Such as junk food, candy (aren't candy and junk food similar?), toy and many more (define many more.you have to state the other things, do not simpply state "many more". it only shows your readers that you don't know what are the "many more").
Besides that, bring a small amount of money during shopping can save money. This is because when we bring small amount of money we will not spend more than we have to. So, it can help to save our money. (for)Example, the cereal (don't tell me you like cereal too! [=_=] ) product A is RM50 and product B is RM35, if we bring small amount of money then we will buy the (item with lower price)lower price of an item.
Lastly, (we should ) search for an item (read my comment on paragraph 1) that have a reasonable price or on sales. Apart from that, we should find an item that gives a reasonable price or (goods that are on )sales So that we can save some money that we use during shopping. Thus, this can save our money. (too short. what else can you include? use WH questions, why? how? when? where?who?. what if i buy items that are on sale but i buy a lot, would this help me to save my money? what should i do then?)
In short , we must not waste money during shopping. This is because save money is important for our life nowadays. [Therefore, it is better to prevent then cure]<<-not very suitable. you need to restate your ideas / wrap all points / rephrase your thesis statement to remind your readers about what you have just written. why do you need to do this? because you want your writing to have an impact to your readers. you want them to remember your ideas.
seems like i've commented a lot! don't get discouraged azfar, go get your cookies! keep on doing mistakes and learn from your mistakes. you're going there
@.@ whoaaaw to many mistake I guess hmph2x,
ReplyDeletemaybe i try again some other time hee..
by the way i run out of cookie maybe tats y I do to many mistake on my essay heee... :P
yeah right! blame it on your cookies
ReplyDeleteazfar don't worry about making mistakes. you learn from them. babies do not know how to stand still if they haven't fallen before. miss dia won't know how to ride a bicycle if she hasn't rammed into a pokok rambutan and cried
haha u dunnoe how to ride bicycle hehehe :))
ReplyDeletewow u rammed into pokok rambutan WOW :OO
sure hurt :P
when i was a babies i already a mat rempit :D
wakakak :))
i DID not, ok. now, i do know how to ride a bicycle. ok, i believe you're already a "mat rempit" when you were still a baby. i believe that because i can see that you are not a normal human being
ReplyDeleteo.o'' but im human but extra ordinary hahah..
ReplyDeletehee..
whatever azfar [=_=]
ReplyDelete(>3>) u juz jelous :)) keekee
ReplyDeletegrrrr...
ReplyDelete